Laura - it's a great question and I would like to know if there are data to show that one group does any better than the other. I fall under the other group of working moms. Throughout my 19-yr marriage, I struggled with swallowing the bitter pill of the disproportionate responsbility that I had of juggling my work, my kids, and the housework while my wasband only had to focus on building his career, keeping his job, and providing for us. All through those years, I realized I didn't work to my highest potential and kept a "job" to preserve my own self-worth....not a career by any means that I could give my heart and soul to grow in.

Bottomline - divorce is brutal regardless of which group we belong to. Because I work, I may not have received compensation for all the other unpaid aspects of my role and a working mother.

Now that I am divorced and I am "single" I don't believe I even have the drive to propel forward in my career. I am just crusing along until retirement with no lofty goals.

We are where we are now and like you said, there is no point in looking at the past. Do the best that we can with what we have.