There is no one equation that fits all, but there needs to be a conversation that can keep pace with the changing needs of an individual or a couple. For example, when I started out in my marriage we both had simple start-up jobs. My understanding was that we were equal partners. As our careers and lives progressed with having kids, my other half assumed the role of the breadwinner. We never had that conversation. I worked full-time all along too, but I was also primarily responsible for the house and the children.

Yes, we all start with aspirations and ambitions and as women we tend to put those on the back burner for the good of the family. The marriage failed after two decades and here I am in my mid-40s single. I have two more years before my son is off to college. Is that when I find my freedom. to pursue my ambitions? I am tired, and don't know if I have it in me to start now. I want to think instead of winding down and retiring early to enjoy the rest of my life.