We have some similarities with the way our father affirmed us. As I read your story, I am convinced no matter the birth order, every child wants to feel heard and seen by their parents without any prejudice about gender or birth order. And we as children gravitate towards that person who lifts us up more. I am sorry you had to play mediator between your parents. No child should have to do that regardless of birth order. I am the youngest of three yet was the one to take on parentification. That's a story for another day.

Thanks for sharing your story, Shanti. Most importantly you are not a failure. We don't have to carve the same paths as those around us and to hell with societal norms. You have been a fighter and a survivor. You've paved your own unique journey in this world and that's special.